Hedgehog Pie
by E-198 Lou
Summary: In a world where mobians and humans don't always see eye to eye, a young hedgehog finds himself in way over his head. Lost on the other side, he must find a way to stay alive, stay sane and stay raw. Though on the way learns more about the world than he at first bargained for.
1. Run run run as fast as you can

**My second fic, this one is an AU, I'm not sure if it will have any continuity. I might end up creating my own, law to it's self, universe, or just chopping and changing however I like. I let you know when I figure it out. Back to Hedgehog Pie, name will make sense, honest promises! Take sonic whatever age you like though at the moment I'm thinking 11-15. whatever floats your boat. As you will see, mobians and humans don't live in harmony with one another. They even speak different languages. Though you, dear reader, can understand both. Without further ado-**

**Disclaimer: (other than this ado...) I do not own Sonic The Hedgehog, he be all SEGA.**

Each breath caught in his chest. Light was fading. Aside from celestial shimmers, the only light was harsh and artificial. He ran with short sharp movements. Short sharp breaths. Shouting. He could hear shouting.

"Gasp!" The cold was making his overworked lungs hurt. Desperation making each second fly past far quicker than it normally did. He couldn't keep up with his own thoughts. Nor the stress. But he couldn't let up now. He'd stuck it this far out. Oh, how he wished he could say 'not when I'm so close to home!'

"Gasp!" Not that he had a home per say. But whatever home was, he was no where near close. He just needed some safety. Somewhere to rest. Away from the shots, the shouts. He'd have to work to get there. "Gaah!" He stumbled for a moment. Risked a glance at his right leg. Blood. Fabulous. That was going to slow him up, _' I ought to pay more attention' _. Not that paying attention was easy given the circumstances...

"Gasp!" Boy did it hurt to breath! How can something so natural be such a pain? And another thing...

Splash

"Gaaauuuugh!" Where did that come from? '_Urgh, that didn't feel good. Probably wasn't clean either. Not the best thing for an open wound. Ha. At least it wasn't a river._' Thoughts were a distraction at this point. He should have thought of that.

A shot startled the poor boy. A flick of the ear. A jerk of the head. A twist of the ankle. Down he went. He stuttered forward at such an angle that he soon found himself using both feet and hands to manoeuvre through the forests green carpet. On reflection, running around the undergrowth like a feral dented in his ego. But this was the here and now. Here and now, as long as he didn't get caught, he didn't care.

"Gasp!" Nobody wanted to get caught. There were few facts. There was plenty of speculation. Put on display. Observed 24/7. Cut up in the name of science. Work on a farm. Farmed. Trapped in houses. Sold in shops. Skinned or shaved. Hunted for fun. And his greatest fear- some rich humans fancy snack. He ran faster.

"Gasp!" Of course nobody knew for sure. The horror stories were enough to put any mobian off. Especially children. Humans kids had the bogey monster. Mobians kits had Henry the VIII. He'd been told those tales. Memories of the nightmares about humans he'd had when he was little, fuelled his exhausted body to continue. He figured that he'd be having them again for the next few weeks. Provided they didn't become a reality before then. _'Then again pies don't dream right?'_

The glare of flash lights scoured mist. For him. Looking for him. Searching for him. Hunting him. The light flickered back and forth. _'Stupid humans. Can't even hold a torch straight. They're giving me a head ache.'_ His sore head grumbled. The humans were not letting up.

"Gotcha'!" And were apparently closer than he thought. He let out a high pitched squeal. A natural reaction. The hand had missed. Barely. He only saw a flash of human. He did hear the rustle of undergrowth.

He tumbled forwards. Tripped. Forwards rolled. Straight into the middle of a "Road?" Water droplets had formed on the tarmac. They collected on the underside of is tail. He blinked a few times. Knocked the edges of his shoes together a few times. Hands patting the damp ground his butt had unceremoniously parked it's self on. "Huh! A road. Where were you when I needed you eh?" He was so busy talking to the inanimate solid mass beneath his slight form that he forgot about the hunting party after his hide.

Until they poured onto the road a few meters behind. _'Get up you idiot! What, d'ya hit your head on the way down?'' _He jerked himself upright and sprinted down the road. Humans hot on his heels. He risked a glance over his narrow shoulder. _'Huh? They were so close... why'd they slow up?' _ An eyebrow rose in confusion. _'Surely they can't have given up so-'_ "Guagh my eyes!" A blinding light. Or two. It happened too fast to tell. He stepped back a few paces. It 'cawed' in warning. Real loud.

He dove off to his right. It swerved the other way. Not that a human would mind if he joined the road kill club. They probably just got a fright. Or didn't want to damage their metal wagon.

On his way off road, the earth under his foot disappeared. Now unbalanced with one knee submerged in earth, the ground crumbling, he dropped. His stomach flopped. Like a short and not fun roller-coaster ride. Then it got more hectic.

Knees made contact with something curved and solid. Torso propelled forwards. The world a blur.

CRACK

That hurt. The "OW!" died in his throat. The world spun. He reeled back. Slipped further down to a now almost horizontal position. Each time he blinked it became harder to heave his lids up again. He could still see the beams of artificial light flailing around in search of him well above his head. The calls of humans still loud yet fuzzy, if that was even possible for sound. He didn't have the strength nor time to debate. His eye sight filled with multicoloured furry caterpillars till the black edges of his vision drowned them.

**YEY! Not a massive chapter. I have a few in the works for this and lots of ideas! Feel like my tense is weird, but... yeah... trying out a few new techniques (sentence length for one). I hope there is enough intrigue to make you come back for more whilst not being too complicated (boring you to death in the process). Reviews (especially those including constructive criticism) are welcome and thanks for reading!**

**Bletherskite**


	2. Foraging

**Hello again! This is the second chapter, don't get your hopes up. Updates will not be this regular forever. Sigh... However I am having fun writing this story and also trying more techniques (namely 1st person accounts). Not sure if I can pull it off, so please let me know if you don't like it and where I can improve – constructive criticism welcome as always. Without further ado – enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: See initial chapter.**

**Sonic's POV**

Ugh! That doesn't feel good! Yak! Wet!Wha- where? Okay, okay. Think it through. Spotted. Chased by humans. Gash on leg. Wait.

Check, that's still there. Hmmm... muddy water apparently not the thing to wash cuts. At least my surprise wasn't a bear trap. That would make running much more difficult. Stop it. Stupid attention span of a gnat. Back to the leg from a horror film. Okay it's not too bad, but still leaking and-

That's not the only thing leaking. What's that on my face? Blood? Great now my gloves look glorious! That is not going to wash out. Wow. Really not the most important thing here. So, I must of hit my head earlier. I'll blame the distractedness for that. Is that a real word? Shut up brain! So I fell in here. Before that... hand, road, metal carriage, fall and here! Alright. Ungh! What is-? What is that on my neck? It's all weird and tingly.

…

"SPIDER!" Off. Off. Off. Off. Ooooooooooooooffffffffffffffff!

**Third person POV**

While the little hedgehog flailed his arms and jumped up into a standing position, the eight-legged offender sauntered off slowly. No doubt bemused smile on it's pincer ridden face.

It only took a bark to make the frantic little mammal freeze. Out of breath from his struggles. Eyes wide with the thought of being hunted down by dogs. They had a good sense of smell. They could track him. No doubt feral too. Trained. Trained to trap him, hurt him, but not damage him.

They weren't friendly. Just obedient to monsters. Malicious monsters. Monsters who wanted his hide on their bedroom floor. Stepping all over his prone form, just because their wooden floor chilled their toes. Then again, they have him draped around their shoulders. Warming their fur-less nape. Worse.

His fleshy- well fleshier- parts brewing in amongst vegetables he apparently stole from their patch. Destined, perhaps, to be a stew. Or a filling. Covered in gravy, wrapped in pastry. He'd have to remember that. It would stop him getting too complacent. Comfortable.

He certainly wasn't comfortable now. Half upright half crouched in what he guessed was some kind of ditch. Probably an irrigation ditch. If he was wrong and it was a moat, he was in trouble. Definitely a royal delicacy. Plan A, part one: Stay hidden.

The weeds and grass seemed to be doing well around its top and sides. They provided some cover. It was morning now, the vegetation must have concealed his carcass long enough to bore the humans. Or they thought he'd move further afield. The murky water probably helped. Dyed royal blue coats a lovely shade of dirty, washed out, mangy, half dead hydrangea. It was pitiful really. It couldn't be mistaken for a stream, never mind a river. In fact, Sonic wouldn't be surprised if the dog from earlier was urinating further up ditch. Somehow it managed to flow. Though he doubted if it wasn't on a down hill slant, the water would be able to dribble along at all.

Speaking of water. He could feel it slithering down his back. Seeping it's way between his quills. As if he didn't hate the liquid enough. He shivered at first. Then spasmed. Then couldn't bare it much longer. As he shook and made unintelligible noises, droplets sprayed in all directions. 'Bet the smell of wet hedgehog travels even further than a dry one.' Breath caught in his chest. The dog.

"SHUT UP! Dumb mutt." That sounded like human. The barking ceased. Huffing and soft growls replaced the once demanding noise. He was grateful for the peace.

Tippy-toes were required before emerald eyes could peer over the edges of the ditch. A row of brick houses stood tall near by, separated from the ditch-come-temporary-bed-for-one-night-only by long fenced gardens. Five or six in a row. Not too crowded. No houses overlooking the gardens. Means no 'Neighbourhood Watch' to call 'Animal Control'. Perfect.

It took some effort to haul himself over precipice. After a bit o' panting, a few handfuls of hedgie huffing and a thirty second pout, he heaved himself off the muddy turf and to his knees. Well. Knees were a start.

He scouted the fences. He could burrow under. Maybe claw up and ov- sniff. Sniff, sniff. A lick of the lips. The removal of drool from the corner of the mouth. The insatiable instinct to forage. To store up fat reserves (Or in Sonic's case simply to get some meat on his bones). Food. Eat.

Following his snout, he wound up with his squishy little black nose through a knot in the wood of a gate. Sniff. Meaty. He needed meat. He opened the eyes he hadn't realised he'd closed when he didn't taste any meat. It wasn't even the taste of slimy slug. It was wood. Great. Battered pride and a splintered tongue.

So busy was our little spiky victim wrinkling up his muzzle and scraping his tongue in the backs of his teeth, that he didn't realise the other slobbering mammal on the other side of the fence. Not till a hot gust of air that smelled like rotting flesh went up his little nose and down his little throat. He fell back onto his rear in surprise.

Dog Food. How degrading. He was drooling over the prospect of dog food. Desperate. It was official. He heaved a heavy sigh. At least it wasn't barking at him now. Just sizing him up through the hole that previously housed his own eye. Perhaps measuring him up for the dog bowl. Curled up he'd defiantly fit. Or maybe he was so skinny it could imagine chewing on his bones (even with it's arguably feeble imagination), picking the best ones. He was so scrawny he himself knew which would be the juiciest.

Eye contact was made. Yup, most certainly a house to avoid. Attention seeking barking could reveal him to any humans. Wearily jogging along to the middle fences, he found a gap underneath a group of planks, raised by a tree root. He couldn't get to the floor quick enough. He shoved his stubby snout between the earth and the gate. No dog scent. Field mouse though. Seems safe enough. He almost drove his hands straight in but... he looked at his hands.

Well one was covered in blood anyhow.

Some pawing and clawing later left a hedgepig sized space. Few! Shimmy through the gap and take a gander at what is in store. Not much. Trees at the far end. His far end. Grass in the middle. Too exposed. Shrubs and flowers round the edges. Could he hide in those?

"Yeah." So he did. No human warning calls. Must of got away with it. Now the next fence. Or wall as it appeared to be. They tend to be deeper. Have foundations. It would take longer to dig under. Even if he could, he doubted he had enough energy, or the room to shift that much soil without creating suspicion (and a scale model of Mount Everest on the lawn). Not to mention he was most certainly not a mole! So over then. "Here I go..."

**Sonic POV**

Uhmf! Not one of my brighter moments. At least falling off the wall was the fastest way down. Quicker than worming my way up. Achoo! Better get off these begonias. Apparently flattening them sends the pollen flying in the breeze, mostly to tickle my nose hairs.

Okay big double doors that are mostly see through. Great and there's people on the sofa opposite. Not my day. I'm gonna have to make a break for it across the width of the garden. Stepping stones and all. Mental note: don't land in the algae ridden pond. Wait till the humans are distracted. Any second. That round one with the long fur and all of the 'human-lets' running round her feet has lent over to grab a tin and is shoving it in every ones faces. Oh, it's biscuits.

Biscuits!? Oh, how I wish she'd shove them in my face! I could kill for a- well no not kill- but I'd still love one. Wait. Perfect distraction. Who can resist biscuits? I know I can't... just run you fool. Go. Gogogogogogogogogogo-oh. Rather convenient hole in the fence. You know, for a guy who can't remember his last meal I sure do feel fat squeezing through these gaps. Oh goody another walled garden time for a repeat of the process. And it's raining. Can this day get any better?

Right, last house. Oh crud. A small house. On the grass. One the humans put dogs into. No. Not more dogs. Please.

**Yes obviously tis Sonic. He really doesn't want to be baked in a pie! 'human-lets' is from hoglets, baby hedgies, that is where that came from. The idea of Sonic having a... pungent dislike of spiders is partly due to his fear of them in the Fleetway Sonic The Comic influence and partly due to my own abhorrence of the things, I love animals. I just can't bring myself to love them. I am heartily sorry spiders. And spider fans. Sorry this is so much of a not a lot going on chapter, the next is kind of getting somewhere, 'honestus promises'. Thank you for reading this longer chapter and sticking with me till the end!**

**Bletherskite**


	3. Green eyed monster

**Me again! I won't forget about my fics, I just won't be updating as often as initially. Though I will update! I should really work on another chapter for Tales On The Beach. But I am still wrestling with that one. It tends to be longer in chapter size anyhow. Focus! This is a little introduction to the main scene of the story. I have not endeavoured to have OCs though the need for humans and back ground characters will arise. Though I will try to focus on Sonic, Please let me know if you like them or not. They are starting to grow on me. **

**Thank you very much for the reviews! I'm having a few issues with seeing and reply to reviews on sometimes so please forgive me but I normally get them at least through PM and thank you for your support! I am dropping the POV I make it too messy. ShinyShiny9 gave me some great tips! ( I'm so pleased to drop it!). I will include more thoughts. Oh yeah _italics_ are thoughts. Forgot about that. I need to stop typing...**

**Disclaimer: See initial chapter.**

He could hear barking. It was coming closer. Little pointed ears couldn't decide whether they wanted to be up and alert or down and pinned back. Quills tensed and raised in defence, ready for the imminent attack. Eyes open, though he wasn't so sure he really wanted to watch...

… voices. Human voices. Barking. On the other side of the fence! _"Few! Ain't that a relief! Hang on - it's getting cl... cl-closer! This is their garden! Their going to come through the gate any second! Stop panicking and hide you moron!_" Hide. Instinct took partial control, filtering his thoughts an quickly whittling down his options. Not near the house... though the tree to the right will suffice. A little slippery with the veil of rain, but the bark was strong and making for great hand holds. "_Hissss. It's rough"_ Skin of his paws and knees being scratched away, if he had the time he probably would have quirked (to himself) about how much he resembled criss-cross chips doused in ketchup. Can't deny that friction makes it that much easier to hold on. The fourth branch was reasonably high. Leaves layered to form such a canopy that a 'squatter' would be a smidgen dryer whilst camouflaged amongst the foliage. "_I can see great from up here."_

There were a couple of clumps of hair bobbing up and down. "H_eading for the gate I wager. Yup. In comes 'poochy', he's not so bad. Kinda small for a ferocious beast, though got more fur than I do!"_ He was right. It's fur was considerably longer and thicker than his own. Not to mention more luxurious. But that wasn't his fault. That dog clearly had a regular baths, brushes and meals. Maybe too many meals. Sonic wasn't vain. Well, okay maybe a little. But he would take a full, chubby little tummy over a rib revealing concave gut. Never the less 'poochy' was cute and fuzzy looking. As though the humans can along and chopped the white tip of Tails tails clean off and used them to coat a naked dog. Sonic forced himself to stop. He could well imagine them doing something so stomach churning. Of course the over active brain imagery didn't help. Back to the matter at hand.

"_Bet it's gotta set of pipes on it though, enough to bring it's humans running that's for sure! Speaking of humans-"_

-it look like a complete set. A mother, father, child and a baby. Father was tall, well built. Curly locks of dark brown fur on his head. A fuzzy line above his top lip that twitched a little when he laughed (at the dog bouncing round his feet like a loon). The hand he placed on his wife's shoulder was huge. Defiantly huge in comparison to the scraggly little mammal.

She was much smaller and round some. But her smile was warm. Baby rested his nearly bald head on her shoulder as she squeezed him (not cutting off his air supply like a certain pink hedgehog) with such love and – "_heck, I wanna join 'im!"_

Were Sonic to join that picture, it would be as that twig of meat trapped between a chubby furless paw and a slobbery toothless mouth. Shivers shook his spine at the thought. While it seemed plausible, surely these trails of thought weren't doing much for his health. "_Great. Chew toy. That just about sums up my life's aspirations."_

That little girl, blond, her fur tumbled down her back. Curly, just like her daddy. Hair becoming airborne as she couldn't stay still, skipping and hopping all over the place. Either singing or smiling, not a frown in sight. "_Oh wait. She speaks!"_ Talking. More talking. Hands flying here there and everywhere. The four-legged mop head wasn't shuntered into the mini house. Rather into the brick house. With the humans. They could take their coats off. It was warm in there. Dry to. Oh. A subconscious frown seeped onto his blue head. A warm but cold yet stinging feeling snaked up from his belly. It left a residue inside of him. He squirmed somewhat. He didn't like that feeling. "_Huh! Gets to stay in the nice warm house. Can't say I'm not jealous."_

"_Well, looks like I can get out of my tree now. One down three to go. Two down thre -was that a snap?"_

"Yelp!". His rear was buried in a mountain of yellows, oranges and reds. Blinking once then twice Sonic began the irksome process of tree shedding removal from his leaf piercing quills. Huffing he stood to admire the wreckage in his wake. "Hmf, not bad." The rain hadn't let up any, it was getting dark, the hedgehog decided that now would be a good time for a warm cosy place to snuggle up. The kennel didn't even cross his mind. It didn't have his name on it anyway. It was 'Broono'. Broono with a capital blue B, and a rainbow for the other letters. _' I can guess whose handy work this is. I need to clear up these leaves, it's a little too obvious something bigger than a flightless bird fell outta that tree.' _

Knees sunk into the soggy earth, Sonic commenced the gruelling task of raking the leaves into some sort of mound with his grubby little paws. _'There! Now for somewhere to sleep.' _He eyed the new formation. _' I gotta admit, my tail was pretty cosy in there. I'd need a few more to cover me though. Then again the earth is dryish but soft underneath these leaves, I cud dig down a little ways...'_

He did just that. After playing Repossession Man and confiscating some leaves in behalf of the Bank of Sonic, he dug a little dip in the soil, probably destroying the turf, and gathered the leaves until it formed an insulating layer. Once in he wiggled some, the earth moulding beneath him. The cherry on the cake was the gap covering. It wasn't that uncomfortable, other than the odd pine cone digging in less than favourable places. In fact it was so cosy and warm he could feel the heat of his own breath bouncing back to blow-dry his face. So cosy that before long he found himself dryish and warm and – ever so tired.

Why couldn't he open his mouth? Surprise caused him to pull back. His muzzle wasn't following. Panicked, he started moving his limbs in reverse, unwittingly burrowing further and further into the soil. It took him a few minutes until he heard whimpering. Listening, it turns out it was HIS whimpering. How pathetic.

She didn't know what to think. Animals loved her! And if Broono's puppy (she's 6 years old, what did you expect?) wasn't wanting to come out and play, well... maybe he was just shy? She sat back, snout still in hand, a look of intense thought nestled on her face. Broonoo had found it. Sniffed around the giant pile of leaves, called her over and then lost interest. Hers had just begun to peak. Head turning a full 90 degrees, one pigtail hanging haphazardly over her face, she had an idea. She'd have to coax him out.

Her grip lessened, though she was careful not to let go (or give the pup enough room to escape) and swirled her hand to under it's chin. Thumb still up the sides and preventing the jaw opening up. '_Frightened animals sometimes bite because they don't know any better, Papa says that.'_ She began to slowly and gently move her palm up and down it's chin a thumb stroking the sides of the muzzle.

The whimpering stopped. Thank goodness. She didn't like crying so didn't think animals would either. He probably just needed a big hug. She could fix that! He just needed to come out of his nest...

Three was the occasional noise of complaint but nothing like the whining before. Her little bald fingers crawled down his chin to his neck fingers waving like a fan over the fur there. Where was that collar? Broono had one. It wasn't until she felt the enormous gulp force it's way down pups throat that she considered the fact he might be scared. _'Maybe a full tummy will help?'_

**I had more to add but I wager that this is long enough. More little girl irritating Sonic to come! And again more Sonic becoming food references. Mwah ha ha ha! Please drop me a review if you can. Hope you enjoyed! Till next time.**

**Bletherskite**


	4. Feeling Sluggish

**Hola! I have a feeling that this chapter isn't very exciting... I just couldn't stop typing... please bare with me! Also thank you sooooooo very muchly for the reviews, favorites and follows! They keep me going and give me inspiration, so please continue. I appreciate your support and your advice. I can't promise to include everything or anything asked but I will try if it can snuggle into a good place. Also (a lot 'o' also in this?), 'I are British' so I may use words/phrases that are very 'English', I would say forgive me but... that's kind of the way I talk so I feel I would be apologising for thinking. Yeah. I'm gonna stop typing now. I hope I write in a way you can picture it in your head, I like to read that way and want everyone to experience it. I'll stop now. Honest. Onwards!**

**Disclaimer: All most forgot (though would it be such a crime?) See initial chapter.**

Had she really gone? Was she just trying to trick him? **PRETEND** her attention span had failed. **MAKING** him believe that she'd let him alone. **THEN** when his guard was down, he would innocently peak out of his autumnal nest, have a quick peak to ensure that the coast was clear and- **POUNCE**!

Do humans pounce? That seems rather feline for them... perhaps they grab. The human in the forest tried to grab him, with those pudgy meaty paws. The thought made his skin crawl. He shivered in place, the rustling noise amplified by his bristling quills causing the leaves to quiver in a similar manner. Rather than dwell on unpleasant thoughts, he deemed it more appropriate to decipher the snack-sized child's master plan.

A little moist nose revealed itself from between some oak leaves (jerking a little as a prickly pine cone went up one nostril). It sniffed once. Twice. Once again for good measure. It didn't smell like human. At least not enough for one to still be in the immediate proximity. There was a lingering smell of one, mixed with a hint of sickly sweet strawberry. It reminded him of home, Amy smelt like that. Only not so sickeningly sweet. More like fresh wild strawberries. A brief moment of nostalgia captured him as he closed his eyes, no, he had to focus on now. Now he was not surrounded by friends. Now he was not at home. Now he was not snuggled in front of a fire, on a rug, twisted in a barrage of blankets.

No. Now he was buried alive by layer upon layer of soggy leaves, on muddy carpet and twisted in a tangle of his own limbs. Now he was surrounded by strange sights and foreign smells. Now he was surrounded by growling dogs and snarling humans.

Humans. That's what he was doing. The snout like the bow of a boat (ironic huh?) pushed the leaves aside. A face began to emerge. Eyes had every intention of being wide, to absorb as much light and thus information as possible. Though that becomes impractical when your light exposure levels have just rocketed. _"Why is the sun so bright!? It was cosy and dark in the... whatever I made last night. Ow. I can hardly see anything. I think my eyes are bleeding! Wait. False alarm. Just watering."_

At some point in the attempt to shield his poor eyes, the hedgehog found himself almost completely leaf free. One hand strewn across his muzzle, still convenient in case of the need for impromptu sun glasses. The other arm like an 'N', hand supporting a great deal of his torsos weight. Where was the rest of him? The most important part of him, he thought. His legs. Without those there would be no running.

"_What would humans want with them!?"_

All thoughts of the human-let forgotten, Sonic's head twirled round in an attempt to cast eyes on his rear limbs. From the waist down he was ensnared in leaves. He slowly dragged his rear half towards him. Making sure that every inch followed, that none had been eaten by his 'safe haven'. He could see them now. Why he dragged them as though they were numb was beyond him. But once he could reach over and touch them, he could breath a sigh of relief.

Taking a good look he frowned. The legs were one of the thickest parts of him. He was scrawny. We've established that. His legs held muscle. They were solid. Substantial. Not like those noodles parading as his arms.

Sonic sat with his spiky cranium tilted to one side. Just staring. What **would** the humans want with them. **He** wanted them. Would they? He heard that humans ate legs. Frogs legs. Though why **anyone** would want to, was another thing beyond him. He would definitely taste better than some frog.

It wasn't until he realised his nose was turned up in a snooty manner that he began to wonder whether he should feel as proud of that as he did... Wouldn't that make him a contender to the dinner platter?

"_Enough with thinking about the humans, LOOK for the humans!"_

After scoping out the area around him, looking for any trace of bald or blonde. There was none. The tension eased in his shoulders. Quills falling limp. He could relax. Marginally. Jumping up, de-leaving and wiping his hands on the back of his frogs legs, Sonic took a gander at his surroundings.

Nice garden actually. Lots of greenery. _"Half drowned. But green. Those downpours really did a number on this place huh?"_ Red brick and mortar towered above him. This house was **big**. By no means a mansion, but spacious all the same. They weren't rich per say, just not hard up. That much was obvious. The house didn't block out much sunlight to the garden. Sonic was grateful for that. Eyes flickering closed as the rays fingered it's way between blue fur strands to the chilled skin beneath. Click.

There were clicks. A slight creak of a hinge. He wouldn't be alone for long.

"Be Careful on those steps! They're still slippery! And don't splash in muddy puddles!"

"Yes Mummy"

"Are you wearing your wellingtons?"

"Mmmhumm."

Her gait looked like a pair of maths compasses trying to traverse steps. It would be funny if it wasn't so cute. The hedgehog didn't notice this, of course, he was to busy diving for cover between the bins. He didn't notice the smell either. Fortunately.

What was-?... Broono's puppy! Bounding made her hair ride the breeze that trailed behind her. She tried not to spill the supplements. Difficult considering how excited she was.

The gimps the little munchkin had caught had been blue. As though someone had smudged a photo of her garden with blue paint. Stopping in her tracts.

He was shy right? (Blue equals boy to a 6 year old... I know a stereotype but give the kid a break!) She had to be super dooper calm and quite and friendly. Ninjas were quite. She'd be a ninja then. Sorted.

That kid made a **lot** of noise. Rattle rattle. Squelch squelch. Giggle giggle. Clang clang. Just as he began to grumble about it, ears pressed to his skull, all fell silent. Huh. It stayed that way for a while. Did she teleport? That as a skill and a half. Were humans magic? Would they use him for a potion? Put him in a cooking pot? That was silly. He really was going crazy. This wasn't Hansel and Gretel, this was... this was... okay, so he didn't know what this was. He'd think of it later. When he wasn't so squashed. Bins are heavy. And grimey. And covered in sludge and slugs, but that ain't the worst. After a couple of deep breaths he finally noticed. _"Grumbph! Ugh what is- why is? Ugh!" _Covering his nose didn't seem to help. Not when his gloves where already doused in the thick, dark sludge. Yeah, they stunk to.

Shifting position might distract him. Okay. He'll try that.

The bins rattled the teeny tiniest bit. Maybe he liked hide and seek! _" I'm real good at hide n seek! Heehee! I already know where he is, this will be easy peasy lemon squeezy..."_ Though it would be of great surprise to her parents, she had managed to remain quite for an unfathomable amount of time! Well. For a hyper 6 year old. Maybe he was excited to. Maybe he was so excited he couldn't stay still... that's why the bins were moving! How clever of her. Well once the little one sees what's in her hand, he'll be even **more** excited. Plus her hand was getting tired.

"_Eeeeeeeeeeeeew!" _Take it from hedgehogs, slugs between your fingers does not feel good. In reality he could eat the slugs. They were part of his natural diet. 'Progress' had meant that mobians don't rely so heavily on their traditional diets much. Smaller islands were viewed as 'old fashioned', still strongly believing in the way their ancestors had feasted for generations. Green Hill being on one of these islands meant that, by this point, Sonic has had his fair share of slugs, earthworms, beetles... though they weren't his first choice. Honestly? He avoided them like the plague. The Plague._"Could slugs carry that?"_ After peeling the slug from between the pads of his paw, Sonic casually glanced in front of himself.

"_Gah!"_ That was as far as he got. The high pitched squeak overtook him at that point. Sonic was too busy hyperventilating to chastise his hedgehog instincts.

A drape of blonde hair covered most of the opening he'd unceremoniously dived through. He drew back. Backside suffering the same fate of his paws previous. Despite how uncomfortable it is having your body become a climbing frame for spineless squidgy morsels, moving wasn't feasible at the moment.

White teeth in a banana shaped smile. What kind of smile was hard to tell. Being upside down can make it difficult. It could be friendly! She was smiling after all. Or it could be mean-spirited and cruel. Thankfully the shadows hid most of him. He could quiver unnoticed. Unless humans can smell fear...

"Ello puppy!"

"Puppy?"

Oops! Eyes widened more as it sunk in that he quite possibly said that out loud. That was worrying.

His hands clamped over his mouth, acting as a word blockade. "Well done puppy! You talk better than your Daddy! Who taught you to talk?" Okay. There was a slug on that hand. And he just ate it. Urgh...

"Shy huh? Well don't worry I got sumfin to cow-wax you out! Wait right there!" In true ninja fashion she 'somersaulted' from the bin lids and out of his view. _"Cow-wax? That doesn't sound good... poor cows. Poor me!" _

Sonic cautiously made a move to get up. At least squat off the floor. Could he make a run for the other end? Or climb the tree? This was the last garden, so he couldn't jump the fence with out a plan. Not in daylight either. One hand shoved a bin, releasing a slight metal scraping metal noise. "Be patient! And stay there, no peaking!"

Fantastic.

He sniffed and huffed in frustration. Sniff. Meat. "There you are!" Oops.

**Ta Dah! I just realised. Sonic literally moved a couple of feet in this entire chapter. That was it. What little progress. Ah well... I hope to make it more exciting for you all in the next chapter. Hopefully you could picture the scenes in your own minds... though sorry about the slug thing. You don't have to imagine eating those. But if you'd like to - imagine jumping in a river of them, getting swept down stream in their slime!**

**For the rest of you, I apologise for that as well. I'll stop. Again. Oh and thanks for persevering guys! You made it to the end. As always pleasey squeezy review for me! I will give each word a mental hug :) If you found that weird I apologise again. I will stop this time. Maybe. One last thanks – Thank you!**

**Bletherskite**


	5. Super duper attractive

**Another one? I can't believe how quick I've gotten this one ready. Though I should probably proof read it again, I just can't wait! Oh, I moved the age rating purely because of my paranoia about Sonics over-active imagination when it comes to food, humans and himself. I have done so much typing and thinking that I shall type no more! Enjoy-**

**Disclaimer: Sigh... See the initial chapter.**

He was almost out. When had he moved? Hunger must have carried him forwards. 'Blondey' stared levelly at him. Did his eye just twitch? He lost the unofficial contest. Looking down and catching sight of the bowl. A dog bowl regrettably. Piled high with food. Succulent cuts of meat, clothed in gravy and practically climbing out of the bowl to meet him!

Yup. He was salivating. Classy. Uh-oh internal war alert.

"_**Food**!"_

"_It's too degrading."_

"_I'm sooooooo hungry!"_

"_I am **not** a dog."_

"_But-"_

"_Or a feral!"_

"_My stomach **hurts**!"_

"_**Or** a puppy!"_

"_But the borborygmus!"_

"_I- the what?"_

"_I don't know. Tails said it once when we were hungry."_

In the mean time, he began panting. Tongue breaching the gap in his teeth, threatening to blast through his sealed lips, straight into the wealth of protein.

She stood watching with a smile of satisfaction on her face. A little further and she could see him. Her patio door swung open. "Darling, inside now it's starting to rain again! What are you doing dear?" Four eyes looked towards the rotund figure balanced between steps.

"_Not now! She'll scare him off!"_

Looking back, that was the moment. The trigger, if you will. He wasn't sure whether it was the ear rolling clattering echo the silver bowl made when it hit the ground, or the almighty clack from the sky. But one pulled him from his Johnny-caught-in-the-healights state. Wits about him once more, Sonic dived back into the recess between the bins he had only just emerged from. Reunited with his friends - Slugworth &amp; Co.

There was a high pitched squeal. For once not from hedgehog origins. As the blonde-bombshell waddled like a penguin who'd stolen the feet from a rocking horse,to her mother who beckoned her inside. Probably out of the rain. Lucky ducks.

Sonic, however, was trapped on the other side of the patio doors. In the cold. Under the storm clouds that decided the rest their lumpy chins on the atmosphere above his pretty little prison. Blue ears flopped, at a loss, this just wasn't his week was it? _"I don't think I've ever seen so much rain." _In truth he probably hadn't. Little did he realise when the rain came to stay, it made a holiday of it.

Sonic never liked water. At least not for as long as he could remember. Never liked water. Not at the best of times. In fact he was debating whether it was better to drown in the stuff and not have to suffer any more, or to be fully conscious with clear lungs but having to live with it wriggling it's way into his fur, saturating the folds of flesh concealed beneath.

He'd almost come to accept it as a way of life. He was **never** dry. Not now. No. Now he was the big drip. In the most literal of senses. That was how it was for the rest of the week. Presumably the rest of the week. He could tell the time of day from the sun and alike, but individual days just sort of mushed together.

Early on rationing came into place. But 'Broono Jr.' had still eaten most of the berries. Edible and... not so edible. He has that to thank for the dehydration. Funny in a weird sort of way really. Considering how much water he was surrounded by. He knew he needed water. He'd tried digging holes to collect enough to scoop into his hands. Suppose the land was saturated enough. But any water he **had** collected was so muddied that it just wasn't worth it. In fact it was probably unsanitary. Not that his alternative was any better.

No. Water pooling on the top of bin lids probably isn't any cleaner. He was on tip toes. Gripping the lid edge whilst shaking knees supported him. Head low. Pink tongue dipping in and out of the film of water.

It was while in the act of lapping up water that he gave in to his instincts further. Once his thirst was moderately satisfied, dulling emerald eyes locked onto a pair of shifty looking beady ones. There was a stand off. No one moved. His lip twitched. Jaw quivering. The beady eyes peered at him further. Then-

It was difficult to tell what was saliva and what was slime. It didn't taste good. But in the moment he couldn't taste anything but the thought that it was **food**! As it slid down his throat and was laid to rest in his shrunken stomach, Sonic couldn't help but gulp down air he hadn't realised he was withholding from himself. There were some whines and groans. As he flickered back into reality, he had another, more shocking thought. He'd need a new name.

He was never too great at names. Too indecisive. Panicked on the spot. Hey, take Tails for an example, creative eh? But even he knew that 'Slugworth Mark 2' wasn't going to cut it. At least he had a new food source. Till he whittled that down. Perhaps he'd have to dig for worms next. He wouldn't even need to pretend to be the rain!

Hmm. Though. That dog bowl was still there. Still untouched mind you. That was one battle from the internal war he hadn't given into. Though it was getting harder. And they hadn't just left the original dog food there to drown. Oh no. Every day there was a fresh bowl. They were making it incredibly hard to keep his resolve. **They** because at first it was only that little monster. But then he'd caught the tall one with the furry caterpillar above his lip leaving him a bowl. They'd take turns.

He could hear the round lady sometimes. She'd complain about them wasting food on a certain someone's imaginary friend. They just ignored her. They were persistent he'd give them that. Standing. Noses pressed against the glass. What were they looking for?

He'd shrug them off and continue to forage desperately for food. It was after doing just this that he got the shock of his life. Whilst kneeling on a bin lid, picking off the poor unfortunate slugs who happen to have had a similar idea, he dropped his guard. Back facing the garden. A spike ball of quills. He hadn't noticed.

The ninjas noticed. They had just placed the food bowl down. And as he began to stand up, 'Poppa-bear' caught sight of blue. They froze. Movements slow.

Sonic was too busy forcing a slug down his throat with his fingers. It hadn't helped that it went down sideways. Or that is was some kind of body building steroid pumped slug that was fighting back with its... one...?... muscle.

"Daddy? What does that taste like?"

Sonic jumped in surprise. Limbs flailing wildly. Slipping behind the bins. Landing head first. Nice.

His eyebrows rose. Partly in surprised confusion and partly in amusement. Poor thing got the fright of it's life. That squeak said it all. As much as he wanted to check and see that it wasn't hurt, he knew further disturbance may just provoke the poor things racing heart beat into inducing a heart attack. He could look out for it. If he caught a glimpse when walking, check that it hadn't broken anything. At least he knew what it looked like. Well- sort of. It was blue and spiky. He got that much.

One thing was for sure. It was **not** a dog. Certainly not Broono's. That was impossible. But what was it? He'd keep an eye out.

After that little ordeal things had gone a smidgen different. Sonic watched from his perch hidden amongst the leaves as the human man below placed down the constant that was the food bowl. He wasn't letting the little girl near though. That was strange. Even when she pleaded. And he **always **gave in when she pleaded. _"What is he up to?"_

Even in the soggy air the smell found it's way to his nose. How? Dampened air had been keeping enticing smells like this from him. That made fighting his hunger easier. So why was this time an exception?

The humans were gone. His eyes were so busy rolling to the back of his head with the delightful waft of food that he hadn't noticed their departure. But he could hardly care. That meaty scent gave him a new lease of life. It wasn't till he heard the squelch of his shoes hitting the marshy earth circling the tree, he realised he had moved.

Peach stomach low to the ground. Shoulders shifting side to side. His neck swooning in different directions trying to get a decent view of the food a little way away. Sonic breathed in. That was it. That was enough. Stuff the internal war. Stuff degrading and undignified. He was **hungry**. And it smelt **so good**. It was a funny old site. A hedgehog stalking a bowl of dog food. But the rage of emotions in him drove him to this. He was **excited**!

As Sonic's blue muzzle hovered above, that was it. The last moment to consider what he was doing. It hit his face. He didn't even register the smell this time. Heat. Steam.

They watched from the warmth of the patio doors. Daddy and daughter watching nature. It was still dark and murky. The clouds made sure of that. The drops and streams gathering on the panes of glass didn't exactly help their cause either. But the kettle did. It was that hydrate dog food. You pour water in. Poor thing looked so wet and cold last time. He couldn't resist. Cup of coffee with milk no sugar for the wife. Mug of tea with a dash of milk and three spoonfuls of brown sugar, though he would of preferred white but his other half insists. Fill them up with the freshly boiled water from the kettle and- why not. Add some to the dog bowl. It felt warm in his hands. Might even help the poor tyke. Might even eat some. Would make a nice change. He doubted there were enough bugs in the garden to fill a hedgehog stomach of that size.

That's right. Hedgehog. He could see him now. Sort of. He practically hoovered up the meat.

It was disgusting really. He considered using his hands, but that would soak some of the meat juices up. Less for him to enjoy. No, muzzle first was so much better. As the meat and _"carrots?" _glided into his tummy, they left a warm feeling where they touched. He sighed and shivered in contentment. Slurping and licking the remaining juice. That was **good**. He didn't care that it stained the peach fur cloaking his face, or that it was running in streams down his chin and neck and chest. It was the first thing he'd consumed all week that hadn't attempted to retreat up his oesophagus. And he would enjoy it.

She was remarkable really. Determined and persistent. Not giving up in her bid to help the strange blue squatter hunched over a dog bowl on their lawn. She had a big heart, much like her mother. And a love of animals, much like himself. Perhaps she would follow in his stead one day? Career dedicated to vulnerable creatures. She'd already shown some signs. Desire to fatten up the scrawny mammal being evidence.

He'd teach her how. Lead by example. Yes. He'd look out for the bundle of inevitable pin-pricks and stubbornness. Observation. Observation is key.

He fell back onto his hind quarters after that. Adrenaline nowhere to be seen. Perhaps a snooze wouldn't be so bad right about now?

"_Not the time hedgehog. Not the time."_ If he wanted to rest his sore eyes he'd need some cover. He suffered from lack of energy, despite gorging on the largest, warmest meal in sight for a long time. _"Well, in sight and in reach. I've saw a couple of fat, steaming dishes. Just. Inside. With the humans." _A lick of the lips.To moisturise them of course. He wasn't salivating. Not at the thought of food. _"Alright. Yes at the though of food. But **not** human food."_

Oak table just about as tall as his measly 3ft something. It stretched for miles. At least from Sonics perspective. Each mile laced with mile upon mile of food. Cotton table cloth hanging lazily over the edges. Napkins stretching upwards to get a peek at some more of the nights delights. Metal instruments poised to attention._"What were they for?" _He hadn't found out yet. One thing he **did** know was that they reflected misshapen images of the morsels teasing him from behind the glass. Clear read sand-castle-like object wobbling at him on the white circle it was sat upon. He supposed they were plates. Human plates. Not mobian plates. Ridged flat leaves or stones that plateaued. There were fruits and vegetables that he recognised also. Shapes and colours and sizes that he had never seen in one sitting. It was strange. Strawberries and raspberries? Next to leeks and blackberries? Not just a few juicy reds. Whole handfuls of them! How? He had to wait for everything to be in season. That wasn't fair. He **hated** waiting.

Wait. There's more. Something lounging on a bed of crispy vegetables. Carried with the utmost care. As it was laid to rest upon the table mat the hedgehog could see it now. Meat. Quite noticeably a cooked chicken. Emerald irises shrunk considerably, white seemed to fill the space they vacated.

He couldn't see a head. Now that he was grateful for! Though the limbs were tied with browned string. Looking at it now. He noticed that it was of rather large proportions. Admittedly, not mobian proportions. Probably. But obscene for poultry non the less. It was stuffed to boot.

With this memory in mind, our current Sonic mentally plummeted from his previous cloud nine to being was inhumanly dropped into the depths of despair. _"What if they fatten the chickens up? They must do..." _Whilst the exact process was not clear to him, the concept was. Whether that concept was true or not is beside the point for the time being.

Head down, a once white glove seized the flesh of the stomach close at hand, kneading it. Twisting and pulling in discomfort. He was lost in his own musings again. _"Capture. Feed. Befriend. Feed. Catch. Eat. That's what they're doing isn't it!?"_ He was reeling back now. Hauling himself back to the other side of the tree. Hidden from those human eyes. Eyes that were judging him. Judging how pudgy he was. Judging how many mouths he'd feed. How hungry he was. How much food they could fill him with.

What would he taste like? Would they need to season him?

Sonic gave himself a look. He was far too scrawny to be sat on that table. For the moment. No doubt he had a while longer before they started preparing his bed of veg. "_Though no sprouts._" If he was going down, he'd rather not go down with them. That could be his last request.

Yes He had time. Not to worry. For now.

**Oh yes, forgot to say, this is a long chapter huh? In comparison to the others anyhow. Sorry about the late warning. Well done if you did it all in one go. For those of you who thought half way 'when is this gonna end!?' I'm sorry, I understand if you took a few breaks, I have to when I proof read. Though I do a hilariously bad job, probably due to the fact I'm trying to concentrate too late at night, I'm sorry you all have to suffer as a result!**

**Thanks for sticking to the end. I've been doing quite a lot of reading up and am trying to subtly squeeze in little details to make the story 'more real', not that a story about a giant blue hedgehog that can run at super sonic speeds is real and believable but hey. Thanks again and see ya'll soon!**

**Bletherskite**


	6. The milky bars are on him

**Long time no see! Actually still no see... but you catch my drift. Here is the next instalment as promised, I have taken on board some advice and I hope you can feel a shift in style between Sonic and his erratic thought process an my still erratic but lengthier narrating. I have been brushing up on my knowledge of hedgies to bring you a little accuracy and enhance your reading experience... or so I hope. Please enjoy my chums!**

**Disclaimer: See initial chapter.**

He knew it. He **knew** it. He knew it would make him ill! Could he stop himself?

No! _"You. __**You**__! Lactose intolerant fool! What? Water in it's purest form not good enough for you?" _A shaking fist collided with the side of his skull, mentally and physically berating himself it seems._ "Oh sure, I was using bin lids as cups, I'll give you – me – that. It's vile. Repulsive even. But that is no excuse to go drinking 'pretty poison'! What are you, a cat?" _A recent study seems to indicate that the thumping of ones head in a rather violent manner isn't a very beneficial action. His headaches seemed to dance to every strike, as though each blow was a beat to a feel-good rhythm in a club with rather generous portions of volume. _"Well, there could be some- no. No Sonic. Don't even think it. Just because there is a __**small**__ chance you do have some feline heritage somewhere in amongst all of those other hedgehogy genes, doesn't change the fact you're a __**hedgehog**__. A hedgehog __trapped__ in __human__ territory!" _A long list was coming, he could feel it brewing, the rant clawing from the pit of his stomach to begin the climb up his chest then into his throat. Though it came across a problem with his tonsils, so rather than unleash it's self orally held off till it reached his greyer than usual matter._"And in the __**rain**__. And stalked by __**humans**__._" Hey, everyone needs an outlet sometimes, think of this as his._ "And __**hungry**__. And __**terrif**__-marginaly concerned for your own safety... And far from home. And from friends. And everything you've ever known. Or cared about. And so hopelessly, helplessly horribly __**lost**__!"_

He gave way a little at that. Dehydration once again purging his system at least that was what he blamed. He hadn't eaten since the 'incident' and yet despite this precaution the petite peach stomach still felt an uninvited need to lurch. On hands and knees he jerked forwards, like a wave, as the nausea snaked through him. Sonic gagged, in doing so allowing a crusted mouth to open, pink tongue lolling. Elbows buckling under the stress, the raspy panting began, the trembles surely weren't doing anything in that hunched little figure any good. He'd taken to practically crawling to make any headway in the solitary confinement that was the back garden. His knees resembled terrified stick-insects too much to be walked upon safely. That and as soon as he thought he **could** right himself, the dreaded lurches would strike again. If he wasn't vomiting he was- er... yes... lets just say that his body was going to purge whatever was in his hedgehogy system one way or another, not much minding the methods it used or the embarrassment it caused him. Sonic would probably have spent most of his time blushing, perhaps he did, not that anyone could tell. His cheeks were always read at the minute and hot, much like the food bowl.

The humans had taken to giving him hot food now, when you've been stranded in conditions like this little blue hedgehog you would have to be as nutty as a fruit and nut bar with nuts on the side to complain about that. It wasn't like Sonic hadn't **tried** to avoid it. At first turning his nose up at the very notion seemed to work. But handling temptation was never his forte. _"Weak minded-"_ Whether he was grumbling about the recent incident or his inability to keep his tongue from licking the bowl clean of any evidence (though the spotless finish was evidence enough in and of itself to the humans) we will never know. One thing was for sure: he was losing his self-control. The 'incident' was confirmation.

It wasn't like he'd been stealing either because she had dropped it, can't blame a hapless hog for that. And she left it out in the cold. Out in the cold... remind you of anyone? Mother human had been dashing about, pretty plimsolls soaked right through to her pudgy pink feet. She had blotches on the cloth humans used to compensate for the lack of fur. Water blotches that made her resemble somewhat a Friesian cow, though nothing was said out loud on the subject as the reception of such an enlightening observation may not have been overly welcoming. The white sacks, buldging from over feeding by the looks of it, kept appearing from the other side of the fence. If she wasn't so frequent he might of stood some chance of escaping, zip out of the open fence unnoticed. But alas alack, there was naught an opportunity for his stumpy blue tail.

The last of the bags eventually made a much sought after appearance. They were 'placed' haphazardly on the rough concrete path with a loud puff. Plump face a lot more red and flustered than he was used to seeing, but not unfriendly as it never was. Fumbling with the lock on the gate was made more difficult with the addition of the grip reducing rain. Finally there was a click.

A tut of triumph, a swift turn, an absent minded grab and the 'shopping bags' (he learnt that was their name as she was cursing them for many minutes later) split in all directions. Food and drink alike rolling away as though this was a merry jaunt. Startled "Oooh!"'s and "Oh"'s filled the garden. He had wanted to run over and help gather the supplies into her arms before throwing a scowl at the rags-for-bags now left holding nothing but water at the foot of her soggy sized 4's.

Still, no matter the good intention, he knew he couldn't. Poor woman's legs might give way beneath her if he did. Then again, there was always that teeny tiny chance she may reward him with the prospect of the nice warm house for a few minutes... _"Yeah, is that before or after she starts cutting the vegetables?" _That and he'd hate to ruin the nice persona he envisioned round her. She made him feel calm just looking at her, and to jeopardise that all because he permitted some fantasies to rule his head would be down right foolish. Besides, the vibes he got from them now hurt much less than the probable truth.

You see, the daughter made him laugh. On reflection. Not when she's standing two feet away grinning at him so hard her eyes get lost in the folds of her cheeks. But afterwards? Yeah, he has a chuckle to himself, maybe the odd guffaw. He's not seen much of the humanlet yet. Who'd let a baby out in weather like this? So that was to be expected.

The father though... He was- well, truth be told Sonic didn't know what he thought about him. He had a similar smile to his daughter, though not so intense and scary looking. His hight and build made Sonic look even smaller than he did around humans in general, so to the man's blue garden gnome he was brobdingnagian! Yet, despite the hands that were so big, Sonic often wondered whether he could sit quite comfortably in them, like in a big armchair, the man managed to hold a certain gentle manner. He never made the bowl clatter on the ground when 'feeding time at the zoo' was his turn. Sometimes, Sonic hardly noticed him at all. A furrowed hedgehog brow decided that one needed to be watched.

And watching was exactly what Sonic resigned himself to doing, the woman was all a muddle, shopping strewn in growing puddles. After almost launching herself and salvaged foodstuffs inside, before making a point of bolting the door shut and joining the curtains in holy matrimony, she disappeared from sight. Leaving something behind.

Had it been a bottle of milk, the female probably would have taken more notice of it. Perhaps even returned later to find it. A couple of pints of milk is so often considered a necessary commodity in our society. But this was not a bottle of milk. No, laying abashed, slowly leaking it's contents, was a lone tub.

I wont go into detail about the wholly unnecessary, rather baffling and slightly mortifying gait the hedgehog used to 'sneak' unnoticed to this alien object. But I will tell you that after a few sniffs he knew what it was. He'd been warned about it. They'd even been allowed to taste a bit on the tip of their finger before it was swiped by their elders preluding a fervent chastising of the children. That didn't stop it being the best thing he'd found to drink since the bin-lid-come-water-butt.

Naturally, after little internal debate, traditional Sonic style, he lapped up the lot. Like a hedgehog who got the cream in the most literal of senses.

The time had come. Now he was suffering for it.

Ah! He'd wondered where his prickly lodger had gotten to. The food bowl had been coming back untouched as of late. Flooded - yes. But untouched all the same. He thought he'd just moved on, grass greener in another garden and all that. He had **hoped** that was the case. The prospect of a hedgehog not eating it's food was worrying. He knew from experience, it was often a sign of sickness.

Those fears where confirmed when the glimpse of cobalt quills and tail turned around at a slugs pace. Paws fumbling for a hold on the tree that looked as though it was about to audition for the part as 'walking aid' in the hit theatrical production Hedgehog Pie, seemingly playing it's part well Bluey rose as though to stand. "Curious?"Though whether or not the hedgie in question could stand and/or walk like a human, he didn't find out. At that precise moment it careened. Like a child who just had their first taste of banana flavoured antibiotics. If the man wasn't so concerned, there was a chance he would have slipped on his not-so-water-proof crocs and congratulated him on the ability to keep it down. As it was though, he remained concerned, noting that now the pathetic creature had resined itself to crawling. He could hardly watch as it staggered around. He'd read up on hedgehogs. A diagnosis already piecing together in his medically inclined cranium. Itchy feet won out overall, he had to do something, or he couldn't call himself a doctor.

If it wasn't for the fact that Sonic had made a private oath to stay on the ball when around that human, he would of tucked his head back into his stomach, content to grumble at nothing. But alas it was **that** human. The giant stopped some distance from him. Not a proximity to be too much of an issue, yet. Though Sonic was sure he'd run rings around that lumbering form any day. Perhaps today wasn't any day... best be on the defensive then.

Quills raised in warning. Slow movements, slow movements were order of the day. He was careful with the placement of his eyes and head. Not wanting to come across aggressive and scare the sickly creature more, but not wanting it to think it was the boss. This was Dr. E. Moffat's garden. His roost was not about to be ruled by anyone but himself. Though he couldn't help a sigh at it's pitiful state.

Crinkling caught his ears. They raised. _"That sounds like... like... those 'shopping bags'. Is that what he's got behind his back? Why is he hiding it?"_ Attempting to look through the human now, Sonic lent forwards on wobbling limbs. Head twisted sideways.

Dr. Moffat watched with sympathy etched onto his brow as two pointy ears drooped with the sudden shift of positioning.

"_I thought that human women put their food in it. He's not gonna try and put me in it is he!? He's moving it around more, and he's... keeping cloth in it... so human men use shopping bags for cloth? Humans are so inconsistent. Is he playing with that cloth? Wow. Humans are so, yeah, strange."_

Playing with the cloth wasn't the right terminology. The man was actually arranging it in order to even the proportions out between each hand.Skilfully keeping his sausage fingers concealed beneath the towel in such a way that the hedgehog could see only burnt orange towel up to the man's biceps. With that done, he began a gradual approach eyes forbidding themselves from lingering on the cowering bundle for too long, staying as calm and natural as possible. Seeming almost leisurely in his decent as he aimed to reduce the appearance of his hight, thus reducing reason for fear on the part of the mammal.

It was confusing. The almost lackadaisical motions stopping his fight or flight instincts from kicking in effectively. Mind in a traffic jam with information and unanswered questions to the point that only when he could smell fresh flowers and honeycomb, he realised the towel was closer to his nose than he wanted it to be.

Blinking out of his daze, quills stiffening in an attempt to look a more intimidating size, Sonic began retreating into the bushes behind. The humans slow actions began to quicken slightly at the thought of his progress being lost. Hands reached down swifter, towards knobbly blue knees. That did it.

"_Not my legs! I don't want them in mint sauce!"_ With little warning the hedgehog began thrashing and flailing in distress. Whilst the actions clearly weren't going to cause much harm to the human himself, he was used to scratches, they could be detrimental to an animal in such a state as the one at his feet. Clearly, at his feet was not where it wanted to be, the other end of the garden maybe. Dr. Moffat inhaled in indecision. He was so close! He could take him inside, find out what was wrong, make him better, feed him up- all he had to do was reach out and grab it.

It was sick and stressed uncoordinated sloppy, easy to catch. But it was sick. He couldn't make that worse. With a heavy, disappointed sigh he plodded backwards.

Sonic froze again. Wasn't it going to grab him? The behemoth hesitated, shifting it's colossal (in comparison to an underweight hedgehog) weight from foot to foot. The being made his following actions humorously obvious to the bewildered hedgehog. _"whaaaat is that nutter doing? Yes. I get it, you're walking away. Congrats, you got the hint! What's he doing now? Oh! How fascinating, putting the cloth in the- he's putting the cloth in the dog house? Why would he leave it out here? It'll get soaked and it could get sto-borrowed..." _As the curiosity that was man partook of his parting steps, he gave one last look at the puffle of quills before tapping the roof of the kennel invitingly. _"Well, he is safely behind the double doors. Aw, isn't that nice, even shut the curtains to give me some privacy. That's a first. Normally he and his princess have their pudgy noses flattened up against the glass. Watching my every move. Urgh."_ Sonic Continued to dabble in one of a hedgehogs most favourite past times – huffing. That was until...

Who knew a kennel could be so interesting? It has so many planks of wood. Most of the walls on this one where rustic red, faded from a misspent post-box youth. Water tight roof, complete with miniature plastic terracotta tiles. Okay. So it wasn't that interesting. Truthfully? It was hard to justify why he was buzzing around the insipid thing so much. It **was** a kennel after all, a seclusion of exile for human pets when they become 'filthy mangy beasts'. According to the grape vine humans had this irritating tendency to attempt to justify their action, example: "Yes dear, but we have to remember they are **wild** animals at heart, still have their instincts and what not. Besides, he'll love the outdoors. See!"

"_Did you notice the question? No? Nor did I." _Sonic monologued as he heard his first sample of a woman with a dog a few gardens over. From the sounds of things, she was reasoning with *cough cough justifying herself cough cough* her step son as to the reason why it was okay for them (her) to chuck Fifi (the female) dog out into dreary weather with little more to shelter her hide than a cramped kennel. "He can run around and dig, though not in the begonias, till his little heart is content. Look how happy he is already." Sonic could almost picture her wondrous dreams of a peaceful and clean house to come for the next day or two, as she swept the curtains to hide the steadily dampening bushel of fur from poor Timothy.

He would have felt for her, going so far as to agree, but he couldn't quite picture it because the rain kept making the mental image being painted run. And if Fifi's snarling was anything to go by, feeling sorry for the human was a criminal offence, punishment being willingly administered by a rabid poodle.

As the soured Fifi sulked to her pompous pink kennel, a green gaze returned to the more hardy version situated on the same lawn as himself.

" It might even be roomier than it looks..." _"Arrgh! Stop! I'm not going to sleep in a cramped, demeaning, dry-"_

**Phew! That was a long one, huh? Oh! If you are an animal owner and you leave it outside or in a kennel, I AM NOT CRITICISING! Please don't think I am! I was just giving Sonic a misguided opinion for plot foundation building purposes, please forgive me! **

**Anyway, there are some real words and some of my own words in there, though the more obscure (believe it or not) are real! I had fun with this one actually. I find it hilarious that hedgies are lactose intolerant because it makes them so much more human-like to me, it wasn't something I expected animals to have in all honesty. Foolish I know, why wouldn't they? But hey, I didn't. Thanks for sticking to the end with me and for your reviews, each one is given a bear hug. Not literally. Or my laptop would be bust... I shall stop now...**

**Thanks again and please keep the reviews coming, constructive criticism is needed. Until next time!**

**Bletherskite**


	7. You are what you eat

**Hello again! It has been so long! I promise I hadn't forgotten, just had to get the chance to finish off the ending a little before having a quick check through and sending you the next instalment! Thank you so much for your support! And we have a few new readers! Yey! Please remember to leave a review if you can spare the time as it helps me improve my writing (or so I hope ;) )**

**This one, I hope there are some funny bits, I hope you all catch my drift and also I hope you enjoy! This chapter is preluding an 'action' scene (*insert oohs and aaahs here*) as 'actiony' as my lazy behind gets anyway...**

**Disclaimer: See initial chapter :p**

"_Humf! I don' know what Fifi was complaining about!"_

If it had occurred to the ragged mobile lump of cobalt fur lounging on a nest of cinnamon towel that he was, perhaps, destroying what shards of his dignity remained, he didn't show it. One ear may have occasionally twitched in an agitated fashion, as if to pull it's owners mind in the direction of the shame that was his current position, but a meagre scratch was all it took to placate it for another half hour. _"Aah..."_ Contented sighs and satisfied mumbles over with, the lull of sleep began to rock his subconscious in it's arms once more. Never one to complain, the hedgehog did as was expected. Breath evening out was promptly followed by soft snores. He hadn't felt claustrophobic in the slightest, on the contrary, he thought it rather cosy.

It was not until some time latter that he found himself upright and a tight squeezing feeling around his muzzle. Reluctantly he peeled his eyes open. Only to discover that his nose was no where to be seen. He blinked a little, in confusion. He could still feel it, admittedly it felt a little different to the rest of him, he just couldn't seem to find it. "_Gaugh! It's in another dimension!" _There was a swirling at his feet, he was disorientated, which way way up?

"OW!" was the cry as a blue tail bent in an unnatural way beneath an equally blue gluteus maximus. Sitting in amongst a pumpkin towel that had at some point encircled his legs like a boa constrictor, Sonic sat confused. Following a few blinks he found something.

His nose! The happy couple reunited once more, the hedgehog laughed at himself, idiot. A hole in the wood, not an alternate dimension at all. Though why he'd awoken with his nose stuffed through it, he had no idea! He wriggled his nose a little, getting the blood flow back into the cold feature and warming it up a little, while doing so catching a whiff of something in the air. A few snuffles later he'd picked up the scent. And it was **good**! Sonic stopped himself just in time before his nose dragged him back into that hole. Deciding to use the more conventional front door, the mammal meandered closer to the fence sporting a gate. The closer he got, the more he realised what that amazing smell was.

It had been a mad dash that morning. The mother and baby club had to move their time and so Mrs Moffat had grabbed the babe to join her fellow child-bearers. This meant leaving Emmett to tend to both himself and his little angel. To say he was stressed was an understatement. It was moments like these, he really appreciated his dear wife. "_I must remember to thank her for everything when she gets back."_ It was in that second that the item he had been targeting at the back of the fridge (which was not only just that little bit too far away and behind a plethora of other food stuffs, but was also half frozen to the back of said white-good) for the last 13 ½ minutes gave up the fight. It was in the seconds that followed, something tried to skydive sans parachute off the top of the chilly appliance.

Was that string? Yes. Yes it was. It looked like the light for the bathroom, the one that daddy tied and extra bit of string to just for her. She couldn't reach otherwise and that meant going to the loo in the dark. And that would **not** do. She could reach this bit of string no problem. _"What light does it turn on?"_ she thought. It wasn't a long wait to find out. All she had to do was go on her tiptoes and reach.

He was covered. She was covered. Some sort of sticky substance long forgotten. Perhaps it was glue in a past life. That would make sense considering all of the arts and crafts that pursued shortly after. Ribbons, glitter, sequins and googly eyes rained down upon the duo. When they dared to open their peepers it was to something akin to a Mr Blobby massacre. The implications were just as terrifying.

It took another bout of showers, fresh clothes and a slap dash tidy up time before darting out of the door. Little got done that morning. Daddy's not so angelic little girl was already late for school when they launched themselves and collection of unfortunate bags into the car. They sped off, Emmetts brain racking it's self, thinking of all of the many things he hadn't done that morning.

Food. Not just any food, fast food. Fatty, greasy, steaming hot food. Oh, how he'd missed that smell. Sonics eyes eventually made it over the fence, the strain on his arms slowly dragging him down the panels of wood he had traversed. It was a white box. There were a few humans standing in a poor excuse for a semi circle around said box. He couldn't quite see in from here, soon that wouldn't be an issue. The scent of food taking up the role of motivational external influence, the hedgehog hauled his carcass over the top. He fell into a tangled mess at the foot of the wooden wall, righting himself speedily was crucial, our hungry chum could **not** miss this opportunity.

Underbelly pressed low to the ground, the hunter began the stalk to the scent source. A slight 'sachet' to his gait as trained emerald eyes danced at the prospect of what was shortly to come. He spared a glance at the organised bunch of savages. No doubt eating his food. Well, not his food per-say, but after the crème de la crème debacle he felt he had every right to a decent human meal such as this. Sonic thought it odd that they all dressed alike. The Moffat family didn't. But aside from considering it odd and oddly familiar it was a fleeting thought. Less so was the realisation that a dog was present amid the grimly dressed humans. Thankfully it had yet to notice him. He'd have to check the wind.

…

Yup. He'd be okay for a little while longer, nosey hedgehog nose picking up dog before the other way around could occur. He'd have to be more careful now though. Dogs not only had better smell than humans, but were more vigilant. Anything was more vigilant than humans in this mammals mind. The situation wasn't helped by the fact that the dog wasn't caught up in the seemingly riveting conversation of the furless. Something about the cost of fuel these days, though he didn't care much to listen. Sonics senses were already occupied, the rather stout red faced man in a poor excuse for white apron, rotating rolls of grease seeping meat to allow them to brown, was far more entertaining.

Sonic hadn't realised how quickly he had advanced. Neither had the humans. Sonic didn't realise how quickly he **was still **advancing. Neither did the chef.

His portly stomach jostled as a customer made a rather crude comment, fiery cheeks bulging as tea stained teeth pushed there way to the front. Spatula still in hand, he made a half pirouette to give a raised eyebrow look to the opinionated but good natured frequents to his van. "-rather than faffing on about the ecosystem so much, It's not like they really care about the vermin anyway. There is more laws to protect the zoos than the animals themselves. Why bother 'saving' the ungrateful little beasts habitats, when it's costing us an arm and a leg. What about our needs? Our habitats?" It was at this point the bringer of all things greasy chose to give voice. "I don't know about them being ungrateful, but I'm defiantly not. And you shouldn't be either!" The group looked around in silence at one another. The spatula still wobbling from gesticulating. "If it wasn't for the little 'vermin', as you put it, what would I have to put in my bread buns?" The whole group erupted in laughter.

Unfortunately the hedgehog among them hadn't heard. Had he, the quest might have been dubbed unworthy. But Sonic hadn't heard. As he crept slowly up the metal rungs that lead to the open door at the rear of the van, he didn't hear a word. Not even as he shuffled his way along the floor, the odd smear of lost-to-the-floor ketchup and mustard latching onto his determined form. Slipping on the fat seemed inevitable, but so far had been avoided.

He was close to the cooking devise now. The heat rising was distorting certain areas of the room when he looked up. He took in a deeper breath of the scent. And stopped. That didn't smell right. It didn't smell nice. Not like before. The aroma was burning his nostrils. The fat was sizzling as a lone burger was thrown to join some hot dogs. It wasn't like the meaty heaven that was dog food, or the mobian variation of human food, meaty and delicious. The rusted spatula was brought down, it's target the fresh meat. That smell was a lot closer to home. He froze. Contact was made and the fat jumped ship under the pressure diving towards the floor where it fizzled it's last words before hardening into a waxy statue. Beady human eyes followed the fat to the floor, it was murder to get off his shoes. Burned your skin to if you weren't careful.

Mobian.

It was hard to tell who realised first. The hedgehog – that his craving for food had led him to one of the most horrifyingly wrong and immoral 'meals' he could possibly of imagined. Led to his very nightmares themselves.

Or the human – he was used to mobians being in his little van, just not normally so furry. Or breathing.

Then it happened. The hedgehog lying in pure terror on the floor, attempting to distance himself from the human by spotting backwards with his arms, became the spatulas next target. Narrowly avoiding the blow via a sideways roll, Sonic shook his head, willing the energy used to widen his eyes to go to his shaking legs. As his scrambled head looked up, it was only to assess that his dodge had put him in front of the vans too-small-for-the-owner gap succeeding the front stairs. This, in turn, put him in the direct sight of the squabble of humans. And the dog.

The massive black and rusty brown creature lunged at him. Teeth bared. The human holding onto the leash lunged with it. Not intentionally. It took a second of stumbling before the man regained his balance and control of his 'best friend'. The semi-circle of humans all stood semi open mouthed, not quite expecting such a raw lunch. Well, at least Joe's stuff was fresh.

Sonics poor heart was trying awfully hard to break out of his chest before it accompanied it's colleagues (lungs) in Joe's next batch of hedgehog haggis. His startled gaze flickered between the redder-than-before mad spatula wielding man, and the group of hungry humans who not only had their lunch delayed by his little outburst but were also getting more familiar by the minute.

A woman at the back reached into a holster. Oh yes. How could he forget.

**Do we all know haggis? Yes? No? Also I enjoyed writing Joe, he was fun to describe, and sorry about the ubber stereotypical name, I may rename him when I review all of my chapters again, but that will not happen until I finish! Was the Mobians being food thing too much? Let me know. But I hope you enjoyed, thanks for reading and until the next chapter story hungry chums.**

**Bletherskite**


	8. Mud-hog Pie

**Little high little ho! (if I remember Stuart Little rightly) Here is le latest chapter for you all to enjoy! I had almost finished this when my computer apparently didn't like the chapter I had written and decided to make me right it again. Twice. I was not the happiest of bunnies as you may well imagine. Also as a result, while the general plan I have in my head for HP remains in tact this chapter has changed drasticly through it's various re-writes :S ah well!**

**In my huff with HP I have begun working on some other stories, though this is still my priority and shall not be forgotten. There should be a new one up soon, a sonamy one, let me hear an 'oooooooh'! No? Nobody? Okay... Also I have a one with Shadow in it! That is there so please have a read of my poor attempt at humour :P**

**Enjoy my little actiony scenes pallywags!**

**Disclaimer: See initial chapter. Also I no own Stuart Little, I just wanted to use their greeting...**

By the looks of it, they hadn't.

Shwithtz.

Thung.

Bullet inches from his left ear. Embedded into the metal van. Left ear ringing with temporary tinnitus. Flicked once. Twice. Blink

_'Run'_

With that thought acting as the starting pistol, the furred intruder twisted. Heading t'wards the rear of the tin box. Noodley limbs clawed, dragging the blue carcass forwards. Lardy limbs jumping in ridged lines. Seemingly random movements but, secretly, adjusting it's aim. Grease ridden spatula at the ready.

Uniformed gaggle divided into two, complete with dog ready for a good hunt, circling the fast food hub. Various implements at the ready, raised and tense in the grip of those stalking to the front. Waiting to pounce on the first sign of blue.

Coming to a left turn, Sonic went flying as a sturdy boot caught his long thin foot and sent the hedgehogs cranium into a collision course with the matt white base units. Limbs collapsed underneath and to the side of him. Lying dazed on the floor, this was **no** option. Green eyes fluttered open in time to catch a silver fly swatter coming down hard. '_Move, move, move!' _

_SPLAT._

A red face. He'd missed this time. Scrambling to the exit. Desperation. Hope. A Roar of rage. Globules of saliva. Foaming at the mouth. **Fear**. It was too much.

As the few downwards steps were within spitting distance the mammal attempted to rise once more to two legs. The process was half way complete when the drop was in view.

It **was** in view. Prime. Achivable. Within reach. He went for it. Sprang forwards. Soaring limbs powerful. Moving with purpose. Contact was made.

"YELP!"

Co-ordination lost, the airborne hedgehog began flailing wildly in his decent. Foregoing the stairs in favour of sailing beyond them. Coming to a grinding halt in the turf. A rut, ground in his wake, that ended with a very muddy nose at it's helm.

The over weight catalyst was standing with all limbs akimbo, body bent as though to get a better look over the edge of it's territory, and a slimy saliva glistened 'smile' (if one could even call it that). The look of triumph saturating over the spectacle that was: a mud coated Sonic whose prone figure was flush with the soil in most places.

The exception being his rather red pulsating behind that stuck up above his head quills in a mildly spectacular fashion. And boy did it **hurt**.

Some sort of noise escaped his throat, a cross breed of pain, embarrassment, annoyance and fear. One paw excavated him from the trench, the other attempted to soothe his poor rear. '_Just be grateful no one you know was around to see that. They'd have your life." _Images flashed through his minds eye; Tails convulsing in hysterical laughter that would later resurface at random intervals during the following nights while Sonic **tried** to sleep, Knuckles grin slowly increasing until his eyes were as visible as his ears before making some not too subtle comment and following it up by chasing Sonic around the Workshop with something akin to a spatula, Shadow mightn't let his smirk settle on his lips but it would in his eyes as he constantly made snide passing comments and references to flex some invisible muscle. _'Oh yes, you are very grateful.' _Our blue friend thought with a pout as he began to rise from his knees. "_Wait. Why am I thinking in the third person again?"_ That question was never answered.

Aggravated shouts, from the surrounding humans he'd almost forgotten were present, pulled him from his musings. Sharp quills cut the air as Sonics head switched from left to right, trying to find an opening. Trying.

It was difficult to think, the guns were in his face, the words and their meanings whizzing round his head and the barking sliced through every other thought. Dizzily the hedgehog made for the space in front of him that he would like to call north east but since he had no clue which direction he was pointing in couldn't really say. That and running for his life was pretty important to.

Running was something he did best. Now on two feet again he could make some headway. Arms pumping like pistons. Legs falling into a dearly missed rhythm. Hedgehog breaking through the pack. He was **running** again. In front of them now, they were left in his dust, to marvel at him!

A giddy laugh slipped through smiling lips as green eyes hid and a feeling of serenity began to settle back onto his free spirited heart like it had once done many years ago and had stayed there until recently. Half conscious sigh sneaked through his nose, mind wandering to happier things than the dangerous dinner concocted in that van.

Sonics mind was lost for a moment. After wandering for so long it realised that getting back to the moment was much more difficult when you had lost your trail of breadcrumbs and in turn yourself.

In this case the breadcrumbs had been violently swept aside by something hard. Mind all a fuddle sonic tried to hold onto anything. _"Ah! Wha- Where? Hnn! Ow!" _After a second of black the brain kick started. Finding it's self curled into a messy poor excuse for a ball. Had he not been so worried he would have spared the time to be ashamed. But as it was he was still, albeit slowing now, rolling forwards.

Sonic sat up to force his eyes and brain into the right sockets. Battered mind reeling like a jukebox through the various disks of information to find some order. Vision in singular mode once again the blue hog felt a shoot of something. "Augh!" Fingers instinctively clamped around the offending area. Closer inspection confirming that a shot to the ankle / lower left leg that while not embedding it's self, gave the hedgehog a nasty gouge. Blood was now seeping through the gasp between his digits but before medical procedures could be carried out shouts distracted Sonic once again.

All war wounds behind him, he jumped up to continue his flee to safety. But the leg wouldn't work. It kept buckling. Giving way. Hurting. Bleeding. A slight disorientation prevented the complaint.

First signs of blood loss.

Barking now. Close. He could see the four legged best friend of man launching its solid muscle at **him**. Its destination. Twitching black lips. Spit coated canines. All for him.

The shot had worked. Distracted him. Injured him. Thus slowing him and making him easier to capture. _'Can't have that.'_ Half stumbling with a gait that varied between using two, four even three limbs the hedgehog still made some ground. The dog was faster than the humans though. Occasionally, when Sonic was especially hurt and tired, it could land a snap dead on, though the adrenalin spike that our leaner blue friend received served to post pone more until it wore off, allowing the pooch to try again.

Limping on empty now, Sonic could see lights in the distance. He could not recall the route he took. The dog didn't seem bothered about direction either, it was closing in. It's target weakening with every stride. Sonic's senses were disorientated, he didn't even realise it was right there. Perfect.

It leaned its head into his side. Wet nose testing the soft flesh of the hedgehogs notoriously sensitive underbelly. Nature required Sonic convulse. Body longing to curl (in order to protect the most vulnerable non quill endowed part) but being with out the sufficient energy to do so. As a result a lurch forwards and a stumble were as close as he got.

The golden pedigree was not perturbed. It merely caught a cobalt knee in it's jaws preparing to render the leg redundant in this chase. There was jerk. "Hulgh!"

**I will be glad when I get this whole chase over with, the fact I have to re write it is driving me crazy! But I will stop complaining... maybe... I'll probably start again next chapter... Ah well! Hope you enjoyed and sorry for freaking you all out with last chapter, I freaked out myself if it's any consolation ;)**

**Thanks for the read guys and please continue to do so! And review! Those are very important, other wise I don't know what stuff to stop doing and what stuff to keep doing! Also any stories you would like to see, let me know, I can't promise anything unfortunately but I would love to see what kind of things you'd like to see from me (but Chapter 7 is about as scary as I get, so nothing that will scare me okay ;) )**

**Thank you to every one who has faved followed and reviewed, you is dah bestest! Until next time :)**

**Bletherskite**


	9. Of Dogs and Hedgehogs

**Helloooo! I am so so so sorry I haven't updated for a while, I have been fightin with ideas and stuff for this one, I'm not so pleased with how this turned out, but I thought I'd give you all ashort and sweet update just to help me move along. This part is killing my will to write grrrsss... but I shall write on through! Enjoy chums :)**

'Starfished' stomach down in the dirt isn't anyone's idea of fun.

And it certainly **wasn't** Sonic's.

Eye level with the long forgotten slugs, it took the downed hedgehog a few seconds to decipher through the pain (swift contact with the hard ground being the main culprit) exactly why he was in the position he found himself in.

**Ah. There it was.**

The vice grip on his knee. An attempt to wiggle free was put to an abrupt halt as the canine growled low in it's throat whilst tensing it's jaw around the joint in it's jaws. The excruciating pain that shot in all directions was warning enough, the growl was wholly unnecessary.

Caught in a, rather one sided, stale mate both hedgehog and dog panted to replenish their oxygen supplies. Emerald eyes flitted every which way whilst Sonic tried to come up with some sort of escape plan. The trained dogs body was done with waiting.

Captor stood straighter, holding the leg between it's canines further into the air and thus within sight of the humans. The dog snorted a hot, damp breath through it's nose in anticipation, the water droplets catching on the blue fur of the others limb.

This angle was uncomfortable. No. More than uncomfortable. It **hurt. **Not only the dangling leg, but as it was now raised so his thigh was no where near the dust his body lay on, he was loosing the feeling in it as the blood had to fight gravity and to top it off - mud and grass was going up his nostrils as his face was squashed further into the earth. Sonic struggled to raise his spiked head a little so he could spot with hie left eye, the other was shut tight to avoid getting stray ground in it, the position of the humans. Then he could work out how much time he had before he became a hog roast. "Strange... Their going the other way? The wrong way..?" movements slowed as acceptance was replaced with hope. How far had this chase of cat and mouse (rather inaccurate terms considering...) taken them?

The victor seemed to realise it two. A whine swayed out of his throat before he opened his jaw wide to bark in their direction. The noise resonated over a wide radius, vibrating the core of the hedgie in close proximity, as if to say 'I'm here! I've caught it! Where are you going? Come back!' The dog made a half a step forwards, debating running up to them and herding them in the right direction. It's right paw was raised. Read to go. It looked down deciding whether to leave is catch or not. That was when he spotted it. Or rather the lack of it. A large brown head switched to the right to see it's escapee fleeing, albeit slowly with it's mangled knee, towards the row of houses and gardens. These would provide it shelter should it arrive, though in it's condition it was not likely to make it there before being recaptured or 'worse'. The street was close enough to make out what it was, though any real features were to small from this distance to recognise. It was still a way off.

Blazing ahead, barks cutting through the air in it's wake, the dog set it's eyes on the hedgehog scrambling away.

Even in his current desperate state he knew he was still fast. Just not as good as if he'd been able to put more than the weight of a leaf on his damaged limb. "**Yelp!**" He was going **backwards**.

Peach arms stretched forwards, claws engraving trails in the grass, hands pulling up roots and chunks of green in their futile attempt to gain purchase. This added opposition did little to slow him. He could hear the humans voices more clearly now.

Firmly in his jaws once again, the dog proceeded to drag the ankle, and in turn the rest of the carcass, towards the voices of it's masters. This was made more difficult as the prey twisted it's self around.

Soil and rocks lodged between his quills, being belly up wasn't a pleasant feeling either, at least now he could see a little better. The grip wasn't so tight this time. A sharp circle of his ankle, followed by a ferocious kick managed to dislodge the blue leg from it's keeper. There may have been a lot more blood now, but he was free. The slightly dazed dog jumped backwards, howling and growling before giving chase again.

He was already gone.

Breath more laboured but still making head way across the undulating land. The pooch, with battered pride, was hot on his heels again. Rather literally. Though both froze in their paw tracks as something darted between them.

Sonic dropped and rolled, hands covering his sensitive ears.

The dog ducked, lower to the ground as a bark of discontent leaped up it's throat.

The **humans** were aiming at him again. It didn't seem to matter that the dog could be in the way.

**Short and sweet yeah? Hope you all enjoyed and I promise this part will end... soon. Please don't forget to review and thank you for your support, until next time, take care!**

**Bletherskite**


	10. Blood Sweat and Tears

**Hola! As promised in There's Something In The Shadows (come on! Suggest a shorter abbreviation! Please! I don't want to say TSITS or TSS... suggestions anyone?) here is the next instalment. To warn you it is surprisingly short for my tastes but it means you get a little taster now. I have the next part in planning and it will have more Moffats in it than this one! Yeah! I missed them secretly ;)**

**Now without further ado I give you- wait. One little ado... not graphic or anything but a wee bit o blood... just to warn yah...**

**No more ado, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: See initial chappie**

Sonic locked eyes for a moment with his fellow mammal. Each staring at the other in disbelief at the sheer gall and stupidity of the humans both found themselves endangered by. There was little time to gossip though. They were at it again.

Sonic muttered something that sounded like 'trigger happy' under his breath though it was lost to the din that seemed to orbit humans.

With an amused snort the hedgehog caught the canine slipping on the glistening grass. Glistening? He risked a glance up. When had those clouds crept up on them? Thin and misty it coated everyone and everything. How had he missed it? By the looks of things he was not going to be able to ignore it now… not when those clouds looked fit to burst with fat, juicy water droplets. "**Ah!**"

He'd forgotten about the humans.

"**Gah! Stop it!**"

And their dog.

While both animals were far ahead of the humans, who were steadily falling further behind, the inhuman technology the humans wielded was still of grave danger to both hog and beast.

The new hole in Sonic's side was testament to that.

Eyes screwed shut, bouncing across the ground, limbs flailing uselessly trying to protect anything. He was so disorientated. Blood loss did that, he'd heard. Don't suppose hitting his head on the earth a few times helped. Funnily enough his little trip had warded off the sharp teeth - the attached head didn't fancy a foot to the face. The wet grasses provided the lack of friction needed to allow his flailing body to rocket across the lawn at a fair pace. Fur slicked down in patches all over his body the way it was when he was a child who just wanted to look cool and didn't quite know how to get the 'Grease Lighting' look. He stumbled in a forwards motion, getting to his shaky feet while attempting to dart forwards.

He had to gasp at what came next.

Hands shot to his left side. The seam where peach stitched itself to blue. Though it was difficult to tell what was peach and what was blue underneath all of the red and purple. A sharp gasp clawed up his windpipe and leaped into the saturated air. No wonder he felt like he was shoved to the dirt.

Running doubled over was not easy. Arms not being much use when glued in place at a dodgy angle. At least the rain, although heavy and overbearing, was helping to soften the dry blood. (On the not so plus side it was now streaming down his body, staining his fur an ugly colour.)

The hunter caught a whiff of the air. The scent was powerful. Blood, sweat and tears.

**Ta, dah! Short as. But ahs wells, there is more in store soons. Please review as it makes my little heart burst with joyousness and I really do appreciate it :) Please read my other stories ( I also have a sonamy one in planning but would like to know the general thoughts in regard to this idea.. or suggestions to any kind of stories you might like to see etc please let me know!)**

**Hope you are not too shocked by my update! Please keep your eye out for more :)**

**Till next time pallywags**

**Bletherskite**


	11. His name is Wiggly Woo

**Hullo! **

**I'm sorry I have taken so long! I was reminded of how long it was since I have updated and my zeal rekindled! So you have Zype to thank for this chapter as it was sitting half completed on my computer until you gave me the motivation to write! :D**

**I shall be updating There's Something In The Shadows soon, but also (guiltily I may add) started working on a new fic.. sigh... I am unsure whether to add it to my first fic Tales on the Beach. If I do have it as an additional chapter, this would become more of a collection of long one-shots with some sort of common thread, that being Sonics past, unofficial and completely AU, using snippets of various different theories from different games, comics my own head etc. Or it could stand on it's own. Let me know what you think.**

**But enough about that, this fic is not gruesome, but yeah, is a little, but that should all change for next chapter! I hope it doesn't feel rushed, I was struggling with how long to focus on each segment. It should really be reread not at 11pm but I want to get it out NOW! **

**I can't wait to write the next chapter it will be much better than all of this angst and tragedy! I'm so sorry Sonic, what have I done to you!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: You know the drill.**

The stench the wounded critter was giving off was too much for the predator instincts to ignore. While the canine had been feeling a little disgruntled at the humans apparent lack of concern for the potential of his being caught in the crossfire (he was featuring a few nicks from their ammunition himself) he was willing to have a revival. No longer wallowing in self pity. But indulging in the thrill of the chase and once the chase was over wallowing in… well.. something entirely different, now that was motivation.

Zeal renewed, the powerful beast leapt forward. Driven towards the distorted blue like a bull to a red rag. Nostrils flaring, determined not to lose it's prey now.

The sticky hedgehog was careening more with every step. Each breath constricting his body, curling him into himself and taking him willingly closer to the ground. Arms and legs an uncoordinated mess of flailing limbs.

The fallen night provided little illumination, the downpour further obscuring vision. Sonic tried to focus his night vision, eyes trying to find something, anything as a reference to guide him. He almost missed the black shadows.

The trained friend of man (no longer best friend he'd decided after a near miss that nearly cost him his snout) could see the figure teetering on the fringes of cognisance. It took the bull by the horns.

A sharp intake of breath that seemed to stick in his airways and suffocate him was the result of the sudden realisation that black was saturating his vision. Tunnelling his sight as his peripheral vision was drown in the shadowy substance of what he guessed must be unconsciousness. Part of him felt comforted, tired now and just wanting to let unconsciousness tuck him in for a good night's sleep. The paranoid part of him was screaming inside, fearing what would be the consequences of succumbing to the obscure shadows. The stubborn part of him refused to give in.

And his back cried in pain. The appropriate message relayed through the spinal column and to the brain, a cry of his throats own sliced through the wet veil. Teeth sinking awkwardly between his own quills, dulled as his body could not bare to spare the energy to tense their commanding muscles. Sonics torso spasmed, unsure which direction to move so as to alleviate pain or free itself.

On the plus side the adrenaline meant he wasn't falling asleep anymore.

A loose quill dislodged itself from the hedgehog's back and managed to wedge itself in the gums of the offending animal. Soliciting a yelp and the release of the blue quill holder. Leaving the mut to its dental issues, our speedly blue mobian used what little strength he had to make a poor attempt at 'speeding' away.

"Ghuuuahugh!" Gasping as he tried to keep a hacking cough-athon at bay Sonic stole a glance behind.

BANG

The need to _OW barely_ registered. Instead of furiously rubbing his right arm, musing the peach fur up in the process, as he usually would have had he ran / fell into a swollen wooden fence, he allowed his body to flop against the Douglas Fir. Right arm immobilised under his own mass for a moment, Sonic's left hand began to grope for some stability against the damp boundary (though for lack of coordination and energy he could not find any.) The cough won out. As it took to the air it pushed him further to the ground, legs jumping at the chance to give way beneath his trembling form. He was vaguely aware of a prickly feeling as he limply slipped to the floor. Half-mast eyes dragged their gaze to the left, only to see his pursuer limping on mud crusted paws towards him, preoccupied with its stinging tongue.

With a silent groan the hedgehog tipped himself forwards, hands catching himself at the last second. Now on hands and knees, green eyes forced themselves to widen and look at the squelching sodden grass between both front paws. Chest heaving with the effort of sustaining life and quills quivering in lieu with the muscles beneath. Sonic schlepped his limbs forward, it was slow progress what with moving at a crawl and all, but it kept some small distance between whomever may be following him.

Returning blackening edges framed the fuzzy rainbow caterpillars ('_they're new…'_) that invaded his vision. The wood that occasionally grazed the pinkie finger of his right hand, giving him some bearing, had stopped a couple of paces back. '_I... must be at the end of the fence...What now?'_

Painfully slowly, he dragged his body forwards. The blue mammal had no idea which direction he was heading, or why he didn't just lie down there and then. _'Breath in. Right. Left. Breath out. Right...Ow'_. Fingers crumpled as they collided with something solid. Sonic twisted his head to face the- what is it?- thing, we'll dub it thing. Vision swirling as it was, seeing was an impossibility. Hand unclenching, fingers haphazardly exploring the thing. It felt like wood. _'More wood.'_ Though smoother and more treated than the last. Leaning forwards, palm dusting the flat surface, he hit another vertical piece, much the same.

_'Stairs?'_

He looked like a tubby worm, elbows onto the step as he wiggled his stroppy limbs to get at least his narrow hips onto the wood. There were a few new scrapes from shaky knees giving way, the lack of support shredding his meatless legs across the boards. And the splinters were fun. Had he the energy to spare, Sonic may have complained about the owner's lack of prowess with sandpaper. '_Not that you'd be expecting a tender bellied hedgehog to be wiggling all over your front porch._'

Flopping onto said porch after climbing the final step, one clawed hand grazed the door. not enough to knock. Just enough to cause a pale lines to appear on the dark brown wooden door. At this point he couldn't tell if it was his vision or his eyes closing, but he let it happen. He was in too much pain. He'd be a fool not to accept the embrace of the blackness that didn't feel so cold and conspiratorial anymore.

As Sonic passed out, body twisted in a position that would deter regular slumber, the humans decided to reconvene after the weather cleared and the sun had risen. The would head home for the night, one having the cheerful task of removing a blue quill from amongst many pointed teeth. The rain continued to dance through the atmosphere, teasing each of its victims. The dark of night would chase everyone inside before being chased away itself. And a switch would be flicked, the chain reaction bringing light to a darkened passage.

**Where is the food reference in this one? Well he gets 'eaten' by a dog and he wiggles like a worm and hedgies eat worms... yeah I just didn't but one in but oh well! There will be some references next chapter to make up for it. And it should be funnier! Yeah! Thanks for sitting through that... Thanks for all of the reviews I have had so far and please keep reviewing (or review for the first time if you haven't already), I need some pointers! It is always a pleasure to know what you think :)**

**Until next time!**

**Bletherskite**


	12. Pretty!

**I can't believe how long it has been since I have updated... I am so sorry! I've been pretty busy and distracted these past few months but I am making a concerted effort to update and write more so yeah. It'd been so long that I've had to re-read through everything before I could post anything new so please let me know if you find any continuity errors. **

**Please let me know what you think :)**

**Enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: Yeah Sonic is SEYGAHS! Not mine so yah.**

He never thought that burning alive would feel so… cold.

It was strange. Parts of him were burning. Really burning. The searing pain was getting through to him now.

Other wise… he felt like ice. Numb if not for the pain.

He heard a moan escape his lips. But had no control over it. It was only when his skull made contact with what he assumed was the floor did he realise he was shivering. Again he couldn't control that either… it was awful. He couldn't even control his limbs pinning themselves to his sides. Restraining him. He felt the world spin, disorientating him, but had no hope of reorientation since his eyes refused point blank to open.

He felt sick…

He couldn't see, the light was too bright! It would burn his eyes and the rest of him would follow. He knew he was burning alive… though he didn't feel hot… like he thought he would… just kind of warm… lukewarm… like a forgotten cup of coffee... his eyelids snapped shut, the trigger for his curling mechanism. He proceeded to bundle himself into a ball as best he could before falling back into the comforting embrace of unconsciousness.

And to think he only wanted a cup of tea. Never usually one to struggle sleeping, he was more than a little confused when he awoke to see his bedside clock on 3am. After tossing and turning (all the while trying not to disturb his wife lest she wake up and make him suffer her wrath) sleep was considered a lost cause, resulting in the need for tea… potentially accompanied by that leftover slice of chocolate cake… yum. After switching on the passage light he made his way to the kitchen. The kitchen that is parallel to the front door. It was just as he was about to turn into said kitchen, thoughts of cake at the forefront of his mind, he imagined a noise.

Of course he imagined it. It was the dead of night after all. Though… it did sound like a scratch. He stopped to listen again.

…

There was nothing. Shaking it off he swung open the fridge door scanning the shelves until the clingfilm covered delight was in sight. Reaching for it, he shivered. The cool air from the fridge whispering through any gap in his nightwear to the skin beneath. With a frustrated sigh the fridge was shut again as he padded bare foot to the door. OCD probably.

When the door swung open… he wasn't sure what he was expecting, but a prone figure was not on his list of probabilities.

Instincts kicking in he dropped to his knees, left hand moving the creature gently while the right found a pulse far faster than the average person could have.

…

Faint

…

Faint but still a pulse.

He swiftly grabbed the creature beneath two limbs and pulled it towards the house. It moved about an inch before he noticed the red. _Right… new tactic…_

She was going to kill him when she realised he'd used the good bed sheet, the fitted one with the elasticated corners. _Ah well, can't be helped. Desperate times and all that. _The man lay the sheet carefully off to one side of the animal, carefully rolling it over and, in doing so, onto the cloth. Being mindful to hold the creature up slightly at one side so as to better unfurl the sheet beneath, the man was able to have the creature lying wholly on the bedding. After moving its splayed limbs to a more compact position he decided the creature was _Ready for transportation._

Grabbing the corners of the sheet again, the man began to pull. His cargo following along nicely. Once he and it made it further into the house, he was able to shut the door. Stained wooden boards of the porch out of sight out of mind for now.

Mr Moffat stood back. Hands on hips. Looking down at the bundle lying in a heap at his feet. The back of his left hand dragged itself across his forehead as a groan of resigned protest eased its way out from his vocal chords. _This is going to be a long night…_

It was exciting having an animal in your home. Well… She had Broono but that was different, she was used to him.

She'd never seen a hedgehog up close before. Only in one of daddy's books. And even the one in that was brown, from memory. Not this gorgeous royal blue colour. _Royal Blue_. She didn't know what that really was, other than her mum called the hedgehogs fur that. And the hedgehog had blue fur. So… Yeah… She felt kinda privileged.

Though she didn't feel privileged at first. No. At first she just felt plain confused. She had plodded through to find her mummy with a strawberry jam stained apron tied in tatty knots barely clinging to her frame, washing up what she assumed to be dishes in the sink in the utility room. Red cheeks puffing up as she breathed out a tired gust of air. Mini Moffat had gone undetected, her mother too distracted to spot her hovering in the hallway.

Her father was is the lounge. She could see him. Perched on the arm of the sofa, he was looking with gray concentration at something on the flat of the sofa cushions, right arm fiddling with something blocked from her vision by the back if the chair.

Like a ninja she sidled up to her daddy. "What's that?" she could half see the, what her father called, hedgehog now. It was sleeping but it's face was scrunched up like when you sniff up a dandelion and the fluff goes up your nose. Was he having a nightmare? "Is it okay?"

"Not really. He's very poorly."

"Oh. Are you gonna make 'im better?"

"I'm gonna try."

"C' n I help?"

She was rewarded with a smile for that. She was truly sweet. The old veterinarian knew she had a love for and a way with animals, she may well follow in his footsteps. Grabbing her hand he brought her closer and placed her hand along the hegehogs side. With his hand on hers they gently stroked the animals side until it's face softened and a serenity set in. Once it was calm she was given a soft bristled brush with which she commenced the job of making the hedgehog look 'pretty'.

Mr Moffat repeatedly took his new charges temperature, blood pressure, pulse etc. His wife had awoken to find him stooped over a blue blob leaking red on her good bed sheet. To be honest the bleeding had been stopped, the Dr was just tidying up his work now, fastening dressings and cleansing small cuts. Together the two had given the pitiful thing a 'bed bath' not wanting to move it too much and settled for cloths and a sensitive aloe vera wash.

In fact, the little thing would look quite handsome by the time his daughter has finished realigning the fur.

Would her pretty hair bows and ribbons look nice in the blue fur? Yes. Yes they would. She would have to bring some to him since it didn't look like he could make it to her room. Once she was done with him, he would look so pretty!

When Sonic finally managed to convince his eyes to open, stay open, he noticed there were no flames. _I guess I'm not burning alive then._ While his eyelids were working, the rest of him wasn't. He tried to move, he really did, but he couldn't. Nothing was working. The hedgehog could hardly tell he was even breathing, that was until a last ditch effort to move. In a valiant attempt Sonic merely succeeded in curving his back slightly. The effort causing his to release a small puff of air. Apparently that was all it took.

Emerald green eyes widened as another pair entered their field of vision. Looking directly down on him. At him.

"HELLO!"

**Neeeeowm! Welp that has been sitting half written on my computer for months, please read and review I would really appreciate it :)**

**Also I have just changed my username from Bletherskite to E-198Lou so yeah... I might change it back... I don't know.. see how I feel.**

**Lol just realised how uneven my 'dividers' are haha**

**Take care, till next time**

**E-198Lou / Bletherskite**


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